2018-03-08

Make Monthly Budgets

Practice of the Week
Make Monthly Budgets

Category: Supporting Practices: Observances that support and expand developing spirituality. They aren't "slogans to live by": they require setting aside some dedicated time. They aren't "occasional," but call for regular application. Nor are they merely "worth a try," since their value doesn't depend on whether you happen to have a taste for them.

Meredith Garmon

If spirituality is about anything, it’s about waking up and paying attention – noticing our own lives, for which the first step is noticing how often we aren’t noticing our own lives. Attention includes attention to money.

First, make a budget. If at your house, there is a precise monthly budget, and you keep track of every dollar spent and what budget category it falls under, then you are doing a wonderful spiritual practice of noticing your life and what it is for. Making a budget and knowing where and when you exceed it really is a deep spiritual practice of paying attention to your life.

The important point is to do two things at the end of every month: (1) compare your actual spending to what you budgeted for that month -- make note of which line items you stayed within and which ones you exceeded, and (2) make a budget for the next month. Whether or not you actually do stick to your budget might or might not be so important, depending on your financial situation. In some situations, making and keeping a budget is a crucial financial practice. Even if, for you, budgeting might not be a financial necessity, it is a spiritual practice of being mindful how your resources are deployed to do good to yourself and others. Awareness of which line items are consistently over or under budget presents you with the question: Do you want to adjust your budget or adjust your spending? Which adjustment will be most conducive to your and the world's flourishing? That's an important and a spiritual question for reflection -- a key question for living intentionally. But you can't begin to address that question until you're making a budget and comparing your spending to it.

Second, as you review at the end of each month how your actual spending compared to your budget for that month, take that opportunity to reflect on what your spending on yourself did for you that month. Every "outgo" (you know, the opposite of "in-come") that isn't saving or donating is spending on yourself (or your family). Then the question for each such expense is: "Is this really helping me/the family? What spending is helping me/us be happy, improving my/our overall well-being, and what really isn’t? Am I spending more than what’s doing me/us any good?"

Maybe your next budget can begin shifting some money out of the spending categories and into one of the two other categories: saving and giving. It’s amazing how willing human beings are to keep buying stuff that not only isn’t helping them be any happier, but is actually making them unhappy. Studies show that as we become less materialistic, our well-being improves, and that as our well-being improves we become less materialistic. It’s a spiritual practice of health and joy to intentionally assess whether the spending on yourself is helping – and how much of it is harmful habits that are only weighing you down. In particular, if that spending has been leading to debt, then it’s a double-killer: you carry the burden of the debt and of the materialism.

Third, as you draft each budget, think about whether it would work for you to give away more. What’s your money for? It’s for doing good in the world. Take care of yourself – which includes not spending on what you don’t need – and give away the rest. I like the website givewell.org for rating charities for maximum effectiveness for every dollar you give.

There are two categories of charity and social good organizations: (1) those that directly help people who are suffering, and (2) those that work for systemic change, reforming the systems that create suffering. Giving food to the hungry doesn’t address the need to change the system that leaves people hungry. At the same time, supporting systemic change so that eventually everyone will be able to feed themselves doesn’t feed any of the people who are hungry right now. So my suggestion would be dividing your charitable giving evenly between those two categories.

Fourth, for saving and giving, think in terms of percents. What percent of your total income can you save? What percent can you, or do you want to, give away? A good starter guideline is 10-10-80. Save 10 percent. Give away 10 percent. Live on the other 80 percent. 10-10-80.

Certainly at different phases of life, and at different income levels, those percentages need to be different. Maybe you can afford to be giving away 20 percent. Or 50 percent. Don’t be stuck on 10 percent giving if you have open to you the possibilities of giving away much higher percents. There is such amazing joy in that – don’t hold yourself back if you don’t need to.

Or maybe saving 10 percent is too much because your retirement is as set as it needs to be, and you have no debts, and your kids' inheritance is already as substantial as it needs to be. (A little inheritance is nice, but a big inheritance may take from your kids the benefits that come from facing tough challenges. Large inheritance doesn't, in fact, do the recipient any favors, though they may not know that at the time.) In some circumstances, saving 10 percent is too much. Don’t be stuck on that 10 percent either.

But as a beginning point for being intentional about who you are in the world, what your resources stand for, try 10-10-80. Try living into 10-10-80 for a year or so and then see what adjustments would be fulfilling, given your position.

Spirituality is a path – it’s a path of awareness and intentionality, of waking up to ourselves and what we are and what we’re doing instead of being pulled along by unexamined habits and impulses. Spirituality of money recognizes that what we do and are includes what we do and are with our resources.

Ariel Kiley writes:
Budgeting is a spiritual practice! A spiritual practice is one where you consciously choose to tune in to and follow the guidance of your higher self. When you are spending money unconsciously, you are following the whims of your unconscious urges, you are at the mercy of your ungrounded fantasies, your wounded ego or your victim mentality. By consciously tracking your spending, earnings and planning where you money is going to go to serve your highest values and callings in life, it become seriously spiritual.
Ariel -- a NYC-based yoga and meditation teacher -- has a created a series of videos about financial freedom that might be inspiring. Here are the links:
#1: The Decision to Get Out of Debt
#2: The Debt I've Been Dragging Around
#3: January 2018 Budget
#4: January Review
#5: February 2018 Budget
#6: February Review

For list of all weekly practices: "Practices of the Week Index"

RE News: Sun Mar 11

Lifespan Religious Education
Find your power! Okay, we may not be able to bring back your electricity, but we can repair and electrify your inner power in our faith community. Being together to support one another and reflect on life topics, as we worship and learn in our welcoming community, nourishes the energy we need to flourish in the week ahead.

Please see the following five (5) announcements:

1) This Sun Mar 11
K-5th start in Fellowship Hall for a music-focused Children's Worship, led by Lyra.
6th-12th start in classrooms.

Classes
Pre-K - Chalice Children
K-1 - Creating Home: John Murray
2nd-3rd - Passport to Spirituality: Utah (Mormon: tithing)
4th-5th - Bibleodeon: Solomon Part 2
6th-7th – Neighboring Faiths: Buddhism Intro
8th-9th – Coming of Age: Our Connection to Nature (Dress for the outdoors)
10th-12th – Youth Group: Youth Service Planning

To view the Religious Education Google calendar, CLICK HERE.
To view a spreadsheet version of the RE Calendar, CLICK HERE.

2) Metro NY Junior High Youth Con Registration
March 24-25 at the Unitarian Universalist Congregation at Shelter Rock in Manhasset, NY.
This event is for youth in grades 6-8 and a fun opportunity to connect with other UU youth.

For more information please CLICK HERE.

To register please CLICK HERE.

For questions about event programming please contact Denice Tomlinson at denice1uu@yahoo.com
For questions about event registration please contact Charlie Neiss at cneiss@aol.com

3) Refugee Children Need Friends
The family that recently arrived from Afghanistan and is living in White Plains would like to make some new friends. Would you and your children like to meet them, maybe for a play date or shared outdoor activity? (The children are 4, 5 and 10.)

For more information, please contact Jane Dixon, lilrhodie@gmail.com

4) Faith Development Friday - Mar 16
An evening of learning, spiritual growth, and community

RSVP to CUUCevents@gmail.com by 12:00 noon Fri Feb 16
so we know how much pizza to order and the number of participants for each group.

6:15pm Pizza & Salad Community Dinner
7:00pm Programs Begin...

Faith Like a River
The Wisdom RE Ministry Team invites you to an Adult RE experience facilitated by Rev. Meredith. This class explores the people, ideas, and movements that have shaped our faith heritage. What lessons do the stories of our history teach that can help us live more faithfully in the present? What lessons do they offer to be lived into the future? You may also join this program online via Zoom videoconferencing by going to https://zoom.us/j/2898507899.

Family Journey Group
Parents gather to discuss the theme of wandering (facilitated by Barbara Montrose), while children have their own group with activities and discussion based on the theme (facilitated by Perry Montrose, DLRE). Adults without children are invited to participate in the parents’ group.

Youth Group Social Night and Service Prep
Join us for a night of fun and preparing for the Youth Service on Sunday!

Social Time for Adults
Those who would like more time to chat and just be together are welcome to continue hanging out in Fellowship Hall after the meal. Come to simply get to know your fellow CUUCers better, without specific programming.

Also stay for coffee and conversation after the programs.

5) UU Common Read Discussion - Fri Mar 23, 7:30pm, Fireside
Hosted by CUUC Wisdom Reading and Discussion Group
We will discuss Daring Democracy: Igniting Power, Meaning, and Connection for the America We Want, one of the two books selected for this year’s Common Read. This optimistic book is for Americans who are asking, in the wake of Trump's victory, What do we do now? The answer: We need to organize and fight to protect and expand our democracy.

Buy a copy after Sunday’s worship and join us!

Facilitated by Rev. Meredith and Sabrina Cleary (clearytheory@gmail.com).

Sincerely,
Perry
Director of Lifespan Religious Education and Faith Development

2018-03-01

From the Minister, Thu Mar 1

"The scarcity assumption." I think we all make this assumption. I do. Maybe I fall a little less often and less far into this assumption than I used to, but, yeah, I catch myself acting like things are in short supply when they aren't. Acting like there's scarcity can be a self-fulfilling prophecy. Help me to live from the truth of abundance rather than the fear of scarcity!

For such help, Parker Palmer is reliable. He explains:
"Nature normally takes us through a reliable cycle of scarcity and abundance in which times of deprivation foreshadow an eventual return to the bountiful fields. This fact of nature is in sharp contrast to human nature, which seems to regard perpetual scarcity as the law of life.

"Daily I am astonished at how readily I believe that something I need is in short supply. If I hoard possessions, it is because I believe that there are not enough to go around. If I struggle with others over power, it is because I believe that power is limited. If I become jealous in relationships, it is because I believe that when you get too much love, I will be short-changed.

"The irony, often tragic, is that by embracing the scarcity assumption, we create the very scarcities we fear. If I hoard material goods, others will have too little and I will never have enough. If I fight my way up the ladder of power, others will be defeated, and I will never feel secure. If I get jealous of someone I love, I am likely to drive that person away. We create scarcity by fearfully accepting it as law and by competing with others for resources as if we were stranded in the Sahara at the last oasis.

"In the human world, abundance does not happen automatically. It is created when we have the sense to choose community, to come together to celebrate and share our common store. Whether the scarce resource is money or love or power or words, the true law of life is that we generate more of whatever seems scarce by trusting its supply and passing it around.

"Authentic abundance does not lie in secured stockpiles of food or cash or influence or affection but in belonging to a community where we can give those goods to others who need them -- and receive them from others when we are in need. Here is a summertime truth: abundance is a communal act, the joint creation of an incredibly complex ecology in which each part functions on behalf of the whole, and in return, is sustained by the whole.

"Community doesn’t just create abundance -- community is abundance. If we could learn that equation from the world of nature, the human world might be transformed."
Thank you, Parker.

In love,
Meredith

The two Common Reads for 2017-18: HERE
The Statement of Conscience, "Escalating Economic Inequity": HERE. Post comment to suggest further amendment to Statement: HERE.
On the Journey, March: Wandering. HERE.

Minister's Tuesday Coffee Chat

I'm at a coffee shop (almost) every Tuesday from 3-5pm. I invite you to drop by and chat.
Mar: Starbucks, 51 Purchase St. Rye
Apr: Barnes and Noble Cafe, Vernon Hills Shopping Center, Eastchester


New on The Liberal Pulpit

The Liberal Pulpit is a YouTube Channel HERE!
This week's posts offer the first two parts of the Feb 18 sermon, "The Spiritual Bypass." Part 1: We're Here to Help Each Other Get Unstuck. Part 2: True Spirituality and Bypassing Spirituality.
Index of past sermons: HERE. Index of other reflections: HERE.

Practice of the Week

Be Generous (Slogans to Live By). When you express your giving nature, it feels good for you, benefits others, prompts them to be good to you in turn, and adds one more lovely thread to the great tapestry of human generosity.

Your Moment of Zen (Raven Tale: #44)

Zen Practice at CUUC: Sat Mar 3

R.E. News

Music News

RE News: Sun Mar 4

Lifespan Religious Education
You may have wandered for only a short while or it may have felt like ages in a desert before you arrived. It may have been years ago or just recently that you found your way to CUUC. Whatever your wandering and at what period in your life you landed here, I am glad that you have found this congregation to be your faith community. You may still be wandering, in regard to finding the right connection here and the fully meaningful experience that you desire. I invite you for a conversation about your personal faith development at CUUC. Email or call me and let’s chat about your journey.

Please see the following five (5) announcements:

1) This Sun Mar 4
K-5th start in the sanctuary for the Wonder Box Story.
6th-7th are on a trip.
8th-12th start in classrooms.

Classes
Pre-K - Chalice Children
K-1 - Creating Home: Bless This Meal
2nd-3rd - Passport to Spirituality: India (Hindu: yoga)
4th-5th - Bibleodeon: Solomon Part 1
6th-7th – Neighboring Faiths: Sikhism Trip (leave at 10am)
8th-9th – Coming of Age: Spiritual Practice with Yoga and Qigong
10th-12th – Youth Group: Youth Service Planning

To view the Religious Education Google calendar, CLICK HERE.
To view a spreadsheet version of the RE Calendar, CLICK HERE.

2) Last Chance for Children to Sign Up for Special Friends
We invite you to join us for this pal program that anonymously matches children and adults in the congregation to get to know each other.

After exchanging six letters over ten weeks, you get to meet your pen pal at the Pancake Brunch on May 6. The letter exchange begins on March 4.

Please email me at dlre@cucwp.org to sign up.

3) Metro NY Junior High Youth Con Registration
March 24-25 at the Unitarian Universalist Congregation at Shelter Rock in Manhasset, NY.
This event is for youth in grades 6-8 and a fun opportunity to connect with other UU youth.

For more information please CLICK HERE.

To register please CLICK HERE.

For questions about event programming please contact Denice Tomlinson at denice1uu@yahoo.com
For questions about event registration please contact Charlie Neiss at cneiss@aol.com

4) Save the Date for Faith Development Friday
Fri Mar 16 is our next Faith Development Friday (Pizza dinner at 6:15; programs at 7).
Programs include Faith Like a River Adult RE, Family Journey Group, and Youth Social.
RSVP to cuucevents@gmail.com

5) Refugee Children Need Friends
The family that recently arrived from Afghanistan and is living in White Plains would like to make some new friends. Would you and your children like to meet them, maybe for a play date or shared outdoor activity? (The children are 4, 5 and 10.)

For more information, please contact Jane Dixon, lilrhodie@gmail.com

Sincerely,
Perry
Director of Lifespan Religious Education and Faith Development

2018-02-27

Music: Sun Mar 4

Sensitive, introspective utterances from Johannes Brahms’ final years are featured in the morning’s Centering Music, performed this week by CUUC Choir Pianist Georgianna Pappas. Our own Kim Force treats us to “Beautiful City”, lyrics for which are provided below. The CUUC Choir is on hand as well, with timeless evocations of travel, adventure, and homecoming. Read on for programming details.

Centering Music: Georgianna Pappas, piano
Intermezzo in E flat major, Op. 117, No. 1
Intermezzo in A major, Op. 118, No. 2
Johannes Brahms


Anthem: CUUC Choir directed by Lisa N. Meyer and accompanied by Georgianna Pappas
Homeward Bound   
Marta Keen, arr. by Jay Althouse
     Mary Lane Cobb and Ted Kuczinski, soloists

Offertory: Kim Force, soprano
Beautiful City*
                                                Stephen Schwartz

Anthem:
The Road Not Taken  
 Music by Andrea Klouse, poem by Robert Frost  


* Lyrics:
Out of the ruins and rubble
Out of the smoke
Out of our night of struggle
Can we see a ray of hope?
One pale thin ray reaching for the day...

We can build a beautiful city
Yes, we can(Yes, we can)
We can build a beautiful city
Not a city of angels
But we can build a city for all

We may not reach the ending
But we can start
Slowly but surely mending
Brick by brick
Heart by heart
Now, maybe now
We start learning how

When your trust is all but shattered
When your faith is all but killed
You can give up bitter and battered
Or you can slowly start to build! 

2018-02-22

From the Minister, Thu Feb 22

Kudos and deep gratitude to Creighton Cray and everyone who has been involved in strategic planning for the last year. Creighton and his team have been talking to people from every sector and level of our congregation and have carefully identified four areas for us to work on. The one-page version (HERE) points us in some general directions -- it's now up to us to work out the details that will move CUUC in those directions.

I'm very impressed with Strategic Planning Committee's work. The four goal areas tell us what we most need to focus on if we're going to realize our vision -- as adopted last June: to become "a welcoming 'sanctuary without walls' that promotes diversity, fellowship, spiritual growth, and inspiration, while committing to people and the planet through social action and service." The thoughtfulness and commitment evident in work Creighton and his team have done is representative of the spirit that has permeated this wonderful congregation for over 100 years!

In love,
Meredith

Check These Out!
  • The Common Reads for 2017-18 (yes, there are TWO): HERE
  • See the Statement of Conscience, "Escalating Economic Inequity" HERE. (This version does not reflect the supported amendments.) Further amendments still to be considered are posted as comments to the post HERE. You can also add a comment to this post to propose an amendment.
  • On the Journey: the February issue explores Love. Pick up a copy at CUUC, or view it HERE.
Let's Chat

The TCC (Tuesday Coffee Chat) takes me to a coffee shop (almost) every Tuesday from 3-5pm -- for anyone who might find that a convenient way to get together with their minister.
  • Feb 6, 13, 20, 27: The TCC is in Irvington! Black Cat Cafe, 45 W. Main St., Irvington.
  • Mar: Rye: Starbucks, 51 Purchase St. Apr: Eastchester: Barnes and Noble Cafe, Vernon Hills Shopping Center
Drop by if you can! You can also make an appointment to see me at CUUC, or invite me to visit your home. Call Pam at the church office (914-946-1660) to schedule either.

New on The Liberal Pulpit

The Liberal Pulpit is a Youtube Channel! Check it out, and subscribe! HERE

This week's posts include all three parts of the Feb 11 sermon, "Love and Desire"
Index, with links, of past sermons: HERE.
Index, with links, of other reflections: HERE.

Practice of the Week

Vegetarianism. Today, with few exceptions, chickens, pigs, and cows are considered to be here on earth only for human use and convenience, which often means that they endure terrible torture in the name of efficiency. There is no longer any sense of these animals being fellow creatures of this earth, no sense that the violence toward them is violence toward all life. The raising of livestock contributes to environmental damage and resource depletion. The grain and land devoted to producing beef and other meats are not available for raising plants, which could feed the world’s neediest people. READ MORE

Your Moment of Zen

The Dark Side. Lutheran pastor Rev. Nadia Bolz-Weber once said: "Theologically I'm not liberal. What I see in a lot of what would be categorized as liberal theology is what we call a high anthropology, which is a very high opinion of human beings and what we can accomplish, like 'All the good of God is inside of you!' And I'm like, 'Are you kidding? It's dark in there!'" At a talk I once attended, Bolz-Weber mentioned that her path had led her briefly to Unitarian Universalism. She quipped, "Unitarians are so cute. They have this high, high view of human goodness. It's like they never read the paper." She's looking at you, Woodpecker!

Case
Next day, Woodpecker came around when Raven was cleaning up after a windstorm, and asked, "Do you think I could be a teacher?"
Raven looked her over. "What's the dark side?" she asked.
Woodpecker hesitated. "I'm not sure there is one," she said.
Raven turned away, saying "Then how can you be a teacher?"
Verse
"All in all, you're just another brick in the wall" (Pink Floyd)

Something doesn't and something does love a wall.
Protecting, preserving, nurturing --
Isolating, trapping --
Defining.
Liberation requires containment.
Your bounds manifest the boundless.
But how can a brick know how it is important
And how it isn't?
Case by Robert Aitken; introduction and verse by Meredith Garmon
Previous Moment of Zen
Saturday Zen Practice at CUUC: HERE

Other News
This week's e-Communitarian
RE News
Music News
Council of All Beings (Cindy)
Loving Animal Nature (LoraKim)
Practice: Vegetarianism (Might Be Your Thing)

Vegetarianism

Practice of the Week
Vegetarianism

Category: Might Be Your Thing. The practices here are not for everyone -- but one of them may be just the thing for you! Any of these might also be, for you, in the "Occasional" category, but are listed here because they are good candidates for regular, central practices.

from Helena P. Chapin, "Vegetarianism," in Everyday Spiritual Practice, adapted.

The seeds for vegetarianism, my spiritual practice, were planted when I was young. I spent a great deal of time on my horse, in fields and woods, with few neighbors around. By the time I was ten, I had my own wildflower garden, full of carefully transplanted gems from the surrounding countryside. My father loved dogs, so we raised Golden Retriever puppies, while helping to deliver I don’t know how many litters of kittens. As an adult, raising a family became my focus, but, gradually over the years, without realizing it, I have returned to my life of connection with animals and the earth.

When I was searching for a house four years ago, I found one with a spruce tree in front and a large cherry in back and a bare backyard in which to plan a Native American perennial flower garden. As the nursery workers promised, butterflies and birds are now my companions as I work among the flowers. This type of gardening requires composting, of course, and my vegan diet means I can use all the waste from my eating in an earth-enhancing way.

But this is getting ahead of myself. In 1991, while attending a conference, I came upon John Robbins’ Diet for a New America. Reading that book brought back my sense of closeness to nature and animals and convinced me to begin eating a plant-based – vegan – diet as a daily reminder of this connection. I was horrified by Robbins’s descriptions of the cruel and violent human behavior in our present-day food factories. Today, with few exceptions, chickens, pigs, and cows are considered to be here on earth only for human use and convenience, which often means that they endure terrible torture in the name of efficiency. There is no longer any sense of these animals being fellow creatures of this earth, no sense that the violence toward them is violence toward all life.

There are other compelling reasons to eat a plant-based diet. The raising of livestock contributes to environmental damage and resource depletion. The grain and land devoted to producing beef and other meats are not available for raising plants, which could feed the world’s neediest people. Finally, a low-fat plant-based diet is healthy for the human body, having been shown to prevent or to aid in healing many diseases. I have noticed that my diet is very similar to those prescribed for heart patients.

Eating a plant-based diet may make good sense, but it is not easy. In particular, food is a very emotional issue. People are fiercely protective of their eating habits and sometimes resent those who make different choices. Even organizations like Greenpeace refrain from discussing food choices as important to the protection of the environment because people will not contribute funds to a cause that asks them to change their diets. “EARTHSAVE, Healthy People, Healthy Planet,” founded by John Robbins, is the only environmental organization that links our food choices to the destruction of the earth.

Still, eating a vegan diet has become part of a satisfying spiritual practice for me. Part of this lifestyle is an attempt to live more according to the rhythms of nature. On a good morning, I rise with the sun, walk my dog, and begin to prepare my meals for the day. If I were cooking meals for a family, the additional time spent in meal preparation might not feel so life enhancing, but I live alone and find chopping and cooking healthy plant food to be a quieting experience, connecting me to the life forces of the natural environment. Also, recycling b composting means that my flowers and I share the same nourishment. Especially when I follow the meal preparation with slow dining in a favorite setting, there comes a mood of contemplation, of pondering life’s gifts, of being grateful to be alive. Thomas Moore writes,
“all eating is communion, feeding the soul as well as the body. Our cultural habit of eating ‘fast food’ reflects our current belief that all we need to take into ourselves, both literally and figuratively, is plain food, not food of real substance, and not the imagination of real dining.” (Care of the Soul)
In a later work, Moore says,
“it’s no accident that in our disenchanted times we have found hundreds of ways to short-circuit the production, preparation, and eating of food, and so it makes sense that to re-enchant our ordinary lives we could approach the supermarket, the kitchen, and the dining room differently, realizing that the extra time real food demands of us is not wasted but serves the soul.” (The Re-Enchantment of Everyday Life)
I have found this to be so.

How does one begin the spiritual practice of eating a vegan diet? It depends on your personality. Once I made the decision, I did it immediately. Others with whom I have talked did it gradually – giving up beef first, then all red meats (pork, mutton), then chicken, then fish, then eggs and dairy – and some stopped after giving up only beef. Any reduction of meat eating will be a plus for your health, the environment, world hunger, and the treatment of animals.

What is important, in the end, is that each of us find some way to live with a depth of appreciation for our gift of life. To better serve the natural world – and therefore, the human world – is my daily effort. Even though it is often unpopular, the spiritual practice of vegetarianism has brought me peace of mind, better health, and a sense of interdependence with our earth and its creatures.

* * *
Resources:
The Vegetarian Resource Group
No Meat Athlete
Nutrition.gov on Eating Vegetarian
Vegetarian Society: Resources
Vegetarian Times

For list of all weekly practices: "Practices of the Week Index"